By Tim Aiello, MA, LPC, NCC, ADHD-CCSP, ASDCS
Clinical Director & Therapist | Myndset Therapeutics
Introduction
Memory is a complex cognitive function that dictates much of our daily experiences. For neurodivergent individuals, particularly those with ADHD and Autism (AuDHD), memory functions can be paradoxical—allowing them to recall minute details of an event from a decade ago while struggling to remember a simple errand from the morning. This discrepancy is largely due to the distinctions between working memory and long-term memory and the way neurodivergent brains process, store, and retrieve information.
Understanding these two types of memory through a neurodivergent and Polyvagal Theory lens offers valuable insights into why individuals with AuDHD may retain song lyrics from their teenage years but forget to pick up milk from the store.
Defining Working Memory and Long-Term Memory
Memory is generally divided into short-term (or working) memory and long-term memory (Baddeley, 2012).
Working Memory
Working memory is the brain's temporary workspace—the cognitive function that allows us to hold and manipulate information for short periods (Diamond, 2013). It is essential for problem-solving, decision-making, and goal-directed behavior (Gathercole & Alloway, 2008).
Limited Capacity: Neurotypical individuals can typically hold about 5-9 items in their working memory at once (Miller, 1956). However, for ADHD and Autistic individuals, this capacity can be significantly reduced, often leading to difficulty with executive functioning tasks (Brown, 2017).
High Cognitive Load: Because working memory is taxed when multiple pieces of information compete for attention, those with ADHD or Autism may find themselves overwhelmed, leading to frequent forgetfulness of short-term obligations (Engle, 2018).
Disruptions Due to Dysregulation: According to Polyvagal Theory, when the nervous system is in a state of hyperarousal or shutdown (fight/flight/freeze), the prefrontal cortex—which governs working memory—becomes less accessible, making recall difficult in stressful situations (Porges, 2011).
Long-Term Memory
Long-term memory, by contrast, is a vast and permanent storage system. It encompasses explicit (declarative) memories—such as facts and experiences—and implicit (procedural) memories—such as learned motor skills (Tulving, 2002).
Highly Associative: Information stored in long-term memory is often linked to strong emotions, sensory experiences, or deep interests, making it more retrievable for neurodivergent individuals (Glisky, 2007).
Hyperfixation and Emotional Encoding: AuDHD individuals often encode memories more effectively when they are personally meaningful, tied to a special interest, or linked to an intense emotional response (Happe & Frith, 2006).
Resilience to Time: Unlike working memory, long-term memories are less susceptible to being “lost” over time, which explains why an autistic individual may remember intricate details about their favorite show from childhood but forget a simple verbal instruction given minutes ago (Baron-Cohen, 2008).
Why Do We Remember Song Lyrics but Forget the Milk?
One of the most common experiences among AuDHD individuals is remembering niche, intricate details from long ago while forgetting simple, everyday tasks. This is due to the different mechanisms governing working memory and long-term memory.
Song Lyrics and Long-Term Memory:
Lyrics are often repeated multiple times (reinforcement learning).
Music and rhythm engage multiple sensory pathways, making encoding stronger (Wallace, 1994).
Emotional connections to songs (e.g., nostalgia, identity) anchor them in memory (Schulkind, Hennis, & Rubin, 1999).
Forgetting the Milk and Working Memory Challenges:
Retrieving short-term instructions requires an intact and efficient working memory, which is often impaired in ADHD and Autism (Gathercole, 2008).
Multitasking or navigating sensory overload (e.g., bright store lights, background noise) increases cognitive demand, causing working memory failure (Bailey & Jones, 2019).
Anxiety, stress, or dysregulation (as explained in Polyvagal Theory) can interfere with frontal lobe processing, making recall difficult (Porges, 2011).
Polyvagal Theory’s Role in Memory Function
Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory provides a crucial framework for understanding why neurodivergent individuals experience memory differences.
State-Dependent Memory: The nervous system’s state—safe (ventral vagal), fight/flight (sympathetic), or shutdown (dorsal vagal)—impacts memory access (Porges, 2011).
Hyperarousal and Memory Retrieval: When an individual is in a chronic fight-or-flight state due to stress or sensory overload, working memory function declines (Thayer & Lane, 2009).
The Role of Safety in Memory Encoding: Autistic individuals often recall past experiences with remarkable accuracy when they feel safe, but struggle with real-time memory recall in stressful environments (Bishop-Fitzpatrick et al., 2017).
Strategies to Support Memory in Neurodivergent Individuals
Given the challenges associated with working memory deficits and the strengths of long-term memory, certain strategies can help bridge the gap:
External Memory Aids: Using planners, apps, or reminders can compensate for working memory weaknesses (Brown, 2017).
Chunking Information: Breaking tasks into smaller steps makes them more manageable (Diamond, 2013).
Sensory and Emotional Anchoring: Associating information with music, visual cues, or strong emotions can aid retention (Schulkind et al., 1999).
Regulation Strategies: Practicing nervous system regulation (e.g., deep breathing, movement breaks) can enhance memory recall under stress (Porges, 2011).
Conclusion
Understanding the differences between working memory and long-term memory is crucial in recognizing the lived experiences of neurodivergent individuals. While those with ADHD and Autism may struggle with short-term recall, their long-term memory can be a source of deep knowledge, emotional connection, and personal identity. By applying principles from Polyvagal Theory and utilizing neurodivergent-friendly memory strategies, individuals can work with their brains rather than against them, creating a more functional and affirming way of navigating the world.
References
Baddeley, A. (2012). Working memory: Theories, models, and controversies. Annual Review of Psychology, 63, 1-29.
Bailey, H., & Jones, R. (2019). Sensory processing and working memory in autistic individuals. Neuropsychology, 33(5), 847-860.
Baron-Cohen, S. (2008). Autism and Asperger Syndrome. Oxford University Press.
Brown, T. E. (2017). Smart but stuck: Emotions in teens and adults with ADHD. John Wiley & Sons.
Porges, S. W. (2011). The polyvagal theory: Neurophysiological foundations of emotions, attachment, communication, and self-regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.
Schulkind, M. D., Hennis, L. K., & Rubin, D. C. (1999). Music, emotion, and autobiographical memory. Memory & Cognition, 27(6), 948-955.
Tulving, E. (2002). Episodic memory: From mind to brain. Annual Review of Psychology, 53, 1-25.
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